Clocks.

All of the clocks in my house have stopped ticking. Not one of them shows the correct time. They did not stop at the same time but all of them stopped within one hour of midnight. My wristwatch and my pocket watch also stopped within the hour of midnight. I am not a superstitious person but this was indeed very strange. I live alone and I close all of the shutters on the windows also I slide in the heavy bolts on the back and front doors before I go to bed. No one could have got into the house through the doors and windows and this stopping of my clocks and watches could not have been done by magic means as my house is under the magical protection of Her Majesty Queen Feeanna, Queen of all the fairies. I have no guests staying with me and the thought that someone might have broken in was annoying but as the doors and windows show no signs of breaking and entering by a third person or should I say house breaker or burglar, it was one of those mysteries that happen from time to time. I turned on my radio and waited for the time signal at the nine o’clock news. I set first my wristwatch then went around the house and started all the clocks and watches off again.

I spent the rest of the day doing a few odd jobs in the garden. I cleaned out one of the cupboards; I had been meaning to do so for some time now but had not gotten around to it. The day passed by normally and I went up to bed at half past nine in the evening. I dropped off to sleep with the noise of thunder in the distance. I awoke at half past eleven and found myself down in the kitchen stopping the kitchen clock on the wall. How I had managed to get up and go downstairs without being awake I do not know. I then looked at the other clocks and watches in the house. I had stopped most of these that is all but my wristwatch, which was on my bedside table. Making myself a cup ofcocoa I thought long and hard, I had a problem or rather two problems why do I walk in my sleep? There have been no incidents of sleep walking in my family, and what have I got against time and clocks and watches, in general? I decided to go the very next day to see my Doctor, I would be glad to have his advice and perhaps he can recommend some tablets to stop my night wanderings.

My Doctor gave me a thorough medical check over and told me that I was very healthy for a man of my age. There was nothing to worry about as long as I was careful not to have any objects in the way that might make me fall when sleep walking. Feeling a little better I made my way home suddenly there was a strange sensation in my head. Some one or some thing, was trying to get into my brain. I was now fully awake and looked around me it was then that I saw a tall woman she was staring at me, it was she that was trying to enter my brain. Now my guard was up and I blocked all attempts from her side to get at me through my brain. The woman then vanished she was no more there where I had seen her. What did she want with me? Was she the one that was causing my sleepwalking and my stopping of all clocks and watches in my house?

Now fully on guard I walked quickly back to the house and sent a mental picture to Shamus my Leprechaun friend. As I entered my house Shamus was there sitting on the kitchen table, legs crossed as was his habit. “What can I do to help you my friend?”  he asked. I told Shamus of my sleepwalking and of my stopping all of the clocks and watches in my house. Shamus told me to go to bed as usual and he would be on guard to see that no harm came to me. I sleep walked again during the night but Shamus steered me away from the clocks and watches. In the morning after breakfast we went out I walked quite openly and Shamus followed me like a shadow. I had given Shamus some of my magic dust with the instruction to throw it over the woman if she started one of her mental attacks. I did not see Shamus but felt the presence of the woman in black. She started her attack silently suggesting that I now not only stopped all clocks and watches in my house but also that I leave all of the windows unbarred and the front and back door wide open. I heard a cry and saw the woman disappearing in the distance. Shamus had thrown a handful of magic dust over her. We met up and I told Shamus of the woman’s attack and that I leave the doors and windows open. We came to the conclusion that she wanted to steal something that was in my house, but what? Then it dawned upon me the only thing for her to steal that would bring in an income, was the ebony stick, that when cleaned would leave a small bar of gold in return. This was on the sideboard in my front room everything else in the house was not worth much and it would not have paid for the woman to break in. That she went to so much trouble by openly attacking me showed that she was fairly desperate. I have not seen or heard of the women since and Shamus spent a couple of days with me to make sure that she did not come back. This is another true story about my friend Shamus the Leprechaun.

Fairy Poet Laureate.

The fairies have taken me abroad to Elfin Land,

Here I was presented with a wide golden band.

I had it seems won the very top literary prize.

I now hold my head very high in the fairy skies.

My rhyming poems have pleased the Fairy Queen.

Such a prolific writer as me she has never before seen.

Rhyming poems and short fairy stories come from my pen.

I have written about the little people every now and then.

I have also been asked to teach at their college.

Fill the little fairy heads with my vast knowledge.

This is a job that would I am sure me please,

but what if the fairies are trying me to tease?

There are quite a few leprechauns as pupils you know.

And we all know how they will try to steal the show.

I have also been offered the title of Fairy Poet Laureate.

I have never owned a title like this before you can bet.

All this attention is going to my grey old head.

Very soon now I will go off to my hotel bed.

The fairies have placed me in a five star hotel.

I am an honoured guest as one can surely tell.

The food and drink is really first class.

I tell myself as I drink yet another glass.

Suddenly I awoke I was in my own bed.

Nonsense was going on in my poor old head.

Upon opening my eyes I saw the wide golden band.

I had really been staying in wonderful Fairy Land.

On my table there was a certificate with Ink still wet.

I was now the only Human Fairy Poet Laureate.

Upon reading this I closed my tired old eyes.

The fairies were always good for a big surprise.

Dangerous Whistle.

To tell this story properly I must first say that I wear hearing aids. Without the hearing aids I am practically deaf. Having said this, I was walking across the Dartford Heath when I first heard this high pitched whistling tone. I would not normally have taken any notice but the whistling noise was giving me a headache. Something was not in order with my little part of the world. It was then I saw the Fairies; they were all lying down as if asleep. I tried to wake them as they were in this condition very much exposed to all kinds of danger. Try, as much as I would I could not wake them. I carefully placed them all in a ring so that each one was touching the other then I muttered the two magic words that transported us all to the Fairies winter quarters under the Himalayan Mountains here I knew they would be safe.

Saying the magic word that took me back to Dartford Heath I then looked to see if there were any more sleeping Fairies. To my surprise I found a Leprechaun that too was lying down fast asleep. I tried to wake him, bit it was no good, he just slept a very deep sleep. I could still hear the whistling and I myself was beginning to feel very tired. I quickly took my hearing aids from out of my ears and the whistling noise stopped. I then took the Leprechaun back with me to my old house and made him comfortable on my sofa.

Queen Feeanna had at one time given me a verse in the old Fairy language. If I needed her help I was to recite this verse and she would come to me as quickly as possible. I recited my verse and sat down quietly in my armchair to await Her Majesty. It did not take long and the blue light and small puff of smoke and Her Majesty was with me in my lounge. Her Majesty greeted me and saw the Leprechaun. I told her my story of finding the Fairies all fast asleep in the woods and how I had transported them to the Winter Quarters under the Himalayan Mountains. Suddenly Her Majesty closed her eyes and I thought at first that she too had been caught by the high-pitched whistling. Quickly taking some cotton wool from my first aid box I made a pair of earplugs and inserted them into her ears. This did the trick, Her Majesty could no longer hear the whistling and woke up.

What was to be done and what is more where was this high-pitched whistling coming from. I showed Her Majesty my hearing aids and asked her to speak to me in picture form. It was now that the Leprechaun awoke and blurted out this story. I read in one of the human’s newspapers that there was a whistle to be had for training dogs. I bought myself such a whistle and then I started experimenting around with its mouthpiece. As you both know I am a travelling Tinker that goes around mending pots and pans and kettles anything with a hole that needs to be mended. I have always had trouble with dogs they just bark at me and indeed from some of them I have had to run away, that is why I wanted such a whistle. I thought that if I could just use the whistle to put the dogs asleep for an hour, then I could go about my trade in peace. Sorry to say I lost the whistle just as I had got it right to put dogs to sleep.

Some children must have found the whistle and tried to get it to make a tone but the whistle is set too high to give a tone that humans can hear. Here Her Majesty took out from her pocket the magic mirror and looked carefully into it. Yes it has been passed around to many children and all have tried to get it to give a tone from it. That is what the Fairies heard and fell asleep but now the whistle is in the hands of a young boy whose Father owns a radio transmitter and with the help of the transmitter he is using the whistle to try to get it to play over the radio. I could take it away from him but that is not my way. “Your Majesty I heard myself say I will go to the local schools and offer a present to the boy or girl that brings the whistle back to me.”

The very next morning I went to see the Headmaster of the local school and in front of the whole school I made this offer. I will give the girl or boy that brings me back my whistle a new book of his or her choice and what is more I would pay for Ice-cream for his or her class. This was an offer that the children could not resist and soon one boy spoke out saying, “Johnny Smith has got the whistle I gave it to him as it did not work.” Then a bright looking boy stood up and asked me if he could really choose his own book in exchange for the whistle. I said, “Yes of course you may, a promise is a promise and I never break promises. Taking the whistle from his pocket he gave it to me and I asked the headmaster whether we could go to the local bookshop to get whatever book the boy desired. I was not surprised as the boy went straight to the books on radios and got himself a book on radios for beginners. I saw him back to the school and hurried off home with the whistle in my pocket.

Her Majesty and the Leprechaun were still waiting for me and the Leprechaun took a silver chain from his pocket and fixed it to the whistle. “I will not loose this again.” He said. Her Majesty smiled and thanked me for my help and if you see a dog in a yard fast asleep, you can bet that the Leprechaun is busy somewhere repairing pots and pans. As for me I wear my hearing aids again and all is as it should be in the house of Shaw.

Fairy Outing.

We all went to the seaside in my old car.

The fairies, family mouse, It was not very far.

Excited cries from my little sweet family mouse,

It was the first time they had been away from the house.

The fairies were delighted with the ocean wide,

Never before had they seen the incoming tide.

Sandy shore as far as the eye could see,

This was surely a most wonderful place to be.

Sea Gulls were flying through the salt air,

My fairies copied them all without a care.

I then hired a small flat wooden boat.

All were amazed at the way it did float.

A picnic basket with the fairies favourite food,

Kept them all happy and in a good mood.

For my family mouse some ripe old cheese,

I knew that this would them all please.

I had a beer and a freshly made meat pie,

I peeled onions to make it and had a good cry.

No humans were here on this sandy beach,

It was a perfect spot well within our reach.

All had a wonderful time on this day at the sea.

The fairies, my little family mouse and of course me.

We will all go together again very soon,

perhaps at night by the light of the moon.

Then I am sure we will see some shooting stars.

Our journey will be lit by glow-worms in jars.

It was tiring driving down to the sea,

Before I go to bed I will make a cup of tea.

Then I locked the doors front and back to my house.

I said good night to the fairies and my little family mouse.

In my large garage stands my old car,

I was happily surprised it took us so far.

Dartford Heath.

Another week has gone by and I am still sitting here in my kitchen waiting for something to happen. I go to bed; I get up, wash, shave and think about what is the best thing to do. I am waiting for something to happen. I do not know what it is or when it will happen. I just know that I am to play a part in what seems to have far reaching consequences. It is like sitting in a cinema watching what is going on, on the screen but not being able stop or even influence the passing scenes. My life is like that at the moment and has been for the last two weeks.

As you all know my life is very complicated because of my activities with the fairies. I sometimes use magic taught to me by the Fairy Queen. Feeana. I write about the fairies so that others especially children may enjoy the experiences that we have together. I use a special magic mirror and have a most powerful magic wand, apart from that I have a pocket filled with magic dust, it never gets empty no matter how much dust I use. I keep asking myself just what is it that I am waiting for? Will it be an episode with the fairies? Or is it just my imagination that has got the better of me?

The arrival of a robin as I was having my breakfast was actually a relief it now meant that something was about to happen. The robin delivered a small piece of parchment into my waiting hand and I read the message very carefully. It was a call for help from the Fairy Queen Feeana. It seems that the local council is with the ministry of transport going to build a road straight across the Dartford Heath. This will split fairyland into two parts. I just could not allow this to happen and with some friends I went to the Local Council to make a protest.

Getting the help of the local newspapers I started off a campaign to stop the road or at least have it built somewhere else. I enjoyed all the arguments with the council and when people got too upset I quickly sprinkled magic dust to calm them down. The local council with the Mayor of the town we soon persuaded that it would not be a good thing to have another road running across the Heath. On this we were soon in agreement what to do with the Government department responsible for building roads.

I had no real say when it came to the Government department. I knew no one and had to ask Her Majesty to help with the non-building of the road. Her Majesty had a plan that she told me. I was to get the Mayor and the local council to invite the members of the government department to come down to Dartford Heath to see for themselves what a road would do to the local landscape. Before the government department arrived her Majesty had transformed the Dartford Heath into a most beautiful garden arrangement.

The gorse bushes were in full flower with the yellow blossoms showing out proudly against the greens and browns of the few trees that were still left. The bramble bushes were full of luscious ripe blackberries. Wild flowers of all shapes and sizes were to be seen. The Heath had never looked so lovely as this before. This was the picture that Her Majesty presented to the government department on the day they came to the Heath to see for themselves what a road across the Heath would mean.

The people from the government department were so impressed at the natural beauty of the Heath that they decided that it would indeed be an eyesore for such a road to be built in such a wonderful piece of land as the Dartford Heath. I am happy to say there is and will not be a road going directly across Fairyland. The local people with the help of the fairies have put a stop to such a stupid thing as a road. Roads surround the Heath. Too many roads if you ask me, now the fairies can enjoy the Heath, which is their home until another comes along and wants a road built.

I now take part on the local council not because I want anything to do with politics. I leave that to other people but to make sure that while I live no one will get any ideas of building on the Heath. I do not have to use my magic dust too often but I always have it ready. One never knows what is going to happen at a council meeting, I can only say I am prepared.

Her Majesty Queen Feeanna invited all of Fairyland to a feast and a dance to celebrate the stopping of building a new road, it would have split Fairyland in two and that was not good for the fairies, after all, who wants to have lorries and cars speeding past and spoiling the peace?  The smells of petrol, diesel and exhaust gasses would have ruined Fairyland. All had a wonderful evening and most danced well into the night it is not often that one can win against a government department.

Child’s Play.

I see the children as they play,
The games I know so well.
I watch with delight every day,
As I listen to voices sweet as a bell.

The cheerful cries fill me with joy,
Smiling faces tell all is good.
My heart goes out to every girl and boy,
And I would play with them if I could.

From my armchair I watch in leisure,
Happy faces out side my window frames,
Yes I am content to see such pleasure
And wish that I could join in their games.

The children take me back to the old days,
When I was young and filled with esprit.
Now I can only sit here and gaze,
Thanking Heaven that I can still hear and see.

Page eight