Well, how else but on a boat could one properly enter Norway? So I took my way from Frederikshavn in DK to Oslo, right through the huge Oslo fjord, looking forward to great sights of fjords and blue waters.
Nothing like that - the weather was grey-in-grey, rain pouring down the plastic-windows which had grown intransparent with the passing years....
I had no Norwegian money on that Stena-boat and became very thirsty after 13 hours of dry airconditioning - one could change money, no doubt, but only paper money - and I wouldn't change 100 German Marks at bad rates.....so have the right currency ready once you need it...

Oslo was not on my list really, I wanted to head on to Bergen, it must be much nicer and there was the Mayhem concert at the Hulen anyway - so off the boat and on the road. Strangely enough people told me I'd need some 8 hours to get to Bergen from Oslo and after dawn one couldn't drive at all (?? for me as a European a total incredible idea - why shouldn't I drive at night? Well, I should find out soon...)

Norwegian customs

Before that I must pass the customs - that was fun! Of course they would look at me - a woman alone, with a black long hair - in a hearse! The questions were the same like in GB years ago....were do you come from...it says in the passport, doesn't it?....what do you do in Norway....holiday...where?...all over the place...were will you stay?...I don't know yet (should I say - I'll sleep behind in the coffin-compartment..)....do you know people here...yes...can I have their addresses...WHAT? Why? No, I won't give you their addresses, there's no reason for that.
That was it really - I was fed up to continue with that stupid little game and so they sent me to their "colleague" on the right side, who lead me into the "garage". Welcome to Norway!
Then followed a ridiculous interrogation by an underdeveloped female agent, asking as catchy questions as ....do you take drugs (sure...what do you think...) of course I had to undress and all that fun. They unpacked my car and let the dog in, everything was upside down in the end and they even half-damaged the ceiling of the driver's cabin. But in my rage I didn't see that before I left, I had enough effort in checking if all clothes were still there. Luckily I could fix the ceiling days later.
I was not allowed to watch them taking my car apart - that's an Oldtimer!!! This law is more than incredible - just like in Germany (great if a policeman wants to get further in his job and packs some Heroin into your bumper - happened in GB once! Your life is over in a minute...)
When I started to interrogate them about this nonsense they told me that this is the usual 'thrilling-action' to prevent youngsters from bringing drugs (even small amounts, like the daily pot) into Norway. I don't take drugs at all (of course they wouldn't believe that) and mentioned the big fat chiefs with huge cars and brief-cases with invisible folders inside and tons of cocaine everywhere... "well, we do check the young people, if you look strange we check you". Great boys, that's good, a good service for your country. 4 people worked for 3 hours for nothing, and I will come back anyway - so it didn't even deter me.
So everybody try to look smart if you want to avoid this...(cut your hair, get a super modest car, nice clothes etc.).

Djungle Oslo

As I finally popped out of the customs it was cold and still raining like hell, total black night, still no Norwegian money, and I was tired to death.
Just great preconditions to conquer a new town....(or rather find the way out of it...).
It's even hard to find the normal road into town (for a bancomat) from the port, there's a huge belt of freeways and roundabouts between the water and Oslo center. After a long circling around I finally got into a strange quarter, first it looked nice - at least a pizza-place there. But as I approach to peep inside I see there's only Blacks inside and it looks more like a drug-bar (.....) no pizza at all. At least there's the bancomat and I get a tea at McDonalds (my favourite food place, believe me...). As I sit in the car to have my tea I watch only black or pakistan people passing by, there was not one white person on that road for at least an hour. OK, time to go.
I'd given up my plans to drive directly to Bergen at the customs already and so I drove up to Hønefoss to sleep there in the car, at a petrol station. Out of this djungle Oslo, that was most important.