First Public Programs

Sahaja Yoga Meetings
Before we had the programs in October 1977, we had all these meetings in a Sahaja Yogi’s place on Sundays and sometimes in the middle of the week. Shri Mataji used to come, exceptionally, because She lived quite far away anyway.
What I remember is She had so much love that She worked on certain people who came to these meetings, even though they were not necessarily great seekers. They maybe had a marriage problem or because they had a specific problem, which was a personal problem. Mother never felt that these people were a burden on Her. She never showed it anyway. She always worked on them with so much love.

Djamel M.


When Shri Mataji came back to England in 1976, after we had first met Her in ‘75, we didn’t have public programs. We just had these meetings at a private house.
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It was an intermediate period, during which many people came to Sahaja Yoga and left and Mother worked on them without ever putting any demands. She always let people choose what they wanted to do. She never forced on people that they should stay in Sahaja Yoga. She always showed a lot of concern for them, for their health, for their well-being. But it paid off. It paid off because, once we started the programs, then we had real seekers, a whole wave of real seekers coming into Sahaja Yoga. Sahaja Yoga had changed beyond recognition, after just a few months, even though until the end of 1977 and throughout 1978 we still had these smaller meetings, where the core of Sahaja Yogis used to come and Mother used to invite us in Her home.
Djamel M.


It was like Sahaja Yoga just changed gear
That was literally a complete sea change. It was like Sahaja Yoga just changed gear. Up to that time it had just been a small group of people going around to different houses with Mother. Then She announced that She would like to have a public program and we were all mystified. We were quite frightened and didn’t know what would happen. We put a big advert in Time Out magazine and hired a room in Caxton Hall, in central London. We didn’t know if anyone would come.
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The programs started around October 1977 in Caxton Hall, formal programs, which we had on Monday. In those days, the first advertisements were in Time Out. At the same time, we had posters, which we put up in shops and on shop windows. A lot of the seekers came from the Time Out advertisement.
Djamel M.


In the end, about two hundred people came. Mother made us sit on the stage with Her in a row, which was extremely embarrassing. One of the Sahaja Yogis gave a talk and then Mother gave a talk and we all sat there trying to look spiritual.
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I came to Sahaja Yoga at the first meeting held at Caxton Hall. Shri Mataji was sitting on the stage with about half a dozen very sick looking people and an English man was standing and talking. I was in the audience and because the advertisement said, “Your divine birthright” and “No money will be taken,” which rang true for something spiritual.

The Englishman’s talk became extremely boring and I thought, “I can’t sit here any longer and I am going to leave.” I had sat near the door so I could make a quick exit. Just as this thought came to my mind and the energy flowed to my legs to stand up, Shri Mataji signalled to this man and asked him to stop talking. Then She got up and started talking. It was everything that I had expected, at least verbally. When we were supposed to feel the vibrations, I didn’t feel anything at all, but something happened in my heart when Shri Mataji said, “All I am here for is to give you love.” I felt this distinct churning in my chest.
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And then bang. It worked out. Everything had changed. Suddenly, Mother was down among the audience, working on everyone. The whole hall felt like one family. Then the whole thing changed. We had seventy people coming to the ashram, to see Mother for long weekends.
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Most of the seekers, virtually ninety per cent of the seekers who came in those days, were from other movements, false gurus of all kinds. In fact, we used to work almost exclusively on people who had been to other false gurus and some were on drugs as well. Shri Mataji used to work on them individually and She gave them so much love. She really worked very hard.
Djamel M.

Mondays, whenever She was in London, Shri Mataji used to hold public introductory programs at Caxton Hall from October 1977 to May 1983 near Her flat in Victoria. Mother would give a talk, then give Realization and would then work on the new people. Of course, later on this was how we all learnt how to work on people, as we would walk round the hall with Shri Mataji and sometimes She would have us work on people, asking us to feel their vibrations. Then either She would show us what to do or ask us what we would do.
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Just barefooted students
Sahaja Yoga was not at all what it is today. It was so informal, as well. First, we didn’t have any programs which were with a lot of people. We used to go and meet at Gavin Brown’s place on a Sunday afternoon. Mother used to come by train to Victoria Station and then She would come by taxi. One of the things I find, when you look at Sahaja Yogis today, now they all have cars. They all go and organize their programs. They all have money. They have all kinds of means. They have a lot more facilities than we had at the time.

I remember when we were staying at Finchley, in the ashram, we started organizing meetings at Caxton Hall, but we never did anything like today, which means we didn’t have all the facilities like having cars and vans and things like that. We were just barefooted students. We used to actually take a picture of Mother and take anything we could take, candles and incense and so on, and we went by bus. I remember in the early days, even Mother coming by train to London from Oxted, where She lived and then She would take a taxi. I even remember Her coming to a program by tube. It seems that we have come a long way. A lot of Sahaja Yogis don’t realize that their standard of living has risen so much. They don’t realize that Sahaja Yoga never started like this. You know, it started with very little means, with the very little that the Sahaja Yogis that were there at the time had. In fact, the Sahaja Yogis used everything they had in their hands to help Sahaja Yoga.
Djamel M.

She was creating the collective
I attended my first Caxton Hall program in the early summer of 1978. In those days, Mother held programs every Monday near St. James Park in Victoria, London. Even outside Caxton Hall and across the road there was this sensation of tranquillity. There were three of us. We were late and Shri Mataji had already begun the program.

Caxton Hall seemed unusually beautiful that sunny evening. I felt like a child. There was a small lecture room with shoes, sandals and chappals piled up outside. Inside Shri Mataji was seated on an armchair, upon a slightly raised rostrum in front of the window. She had Her left hand upon the Sahasrara of a young woman, who sat on the floor with her back towards Shri Mataji, slightly to Her left. There were two or three other young people sitting on the rostrum around Her Feet.
My first impression was of a large, confident personality, full of warmth and humour, completely different to the silent, little Madonna I had expected. Her hair was loose about Her shoulders. Her arms seemed huge and powerful. I noticed Her smile.

As we entered, She broke off from the talk She was giving to greet us, calling out a warm and friendly, “Hello. Come, come. Are you new?” A small international group of alternative-type young people were seated respectfully on rows of chairs, facing Mother, with their hands out, palms upward. Shri Mataji indicated for us to go and sit near Her on the rostrum. She told us to close our eyes and to put our hands, palms upward, out to Her. Then She asked those seated around to watch and see if our eyelids flickered. Mine did and somebody pointed it out.

When She turned to me and inquired about my fluttery eyelids, I told Her that I occasionally suffered from tension, although I felt so peaceful there. She said, “Oh, my poor child” and got me to remove the giraffe-hair bracelet that I was wearing. The fluttering stopped. She told us to stop thinking. It was very easy. I felt wonderful. She turned to me a couple of times, saying to the others, “Look, she’s beautiful.” I looked around me and everyone was radiant with innocent, open faces. Shri Mataji seemed to work on each and everybody.

She was the nucleus, calling out to every one of us whilst we worked, “How is she?” or “Where is he catching?” “Has she got it?” We were all taking vibrations from Her, whilst we worked and meanwhile She would be personally working on someone else and often giving a talk at the same time. Sometimes She would sit someone down in front of Her and then ask everybody, “How is he? Which chakra is blocked?”
She was creating the collective.
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The difference between the cool and the heat
I was at a public meeting, again in Caxton Hall. I had been coming to Sahaja Yoga for a few months and a Sahaja Yogi, one of the “first five hippies,” worked on me from the back, particularly on my Agnya. All of a sudden, I began to feel this tremendous cool breeze flowing.

In those days, Shri Mataji used to come by and talk to each one of us. She came up to me and asked me, “Are you feeling the cool breeze?”
“Yes.” Then She told me to put one hand towards Her and one hand towards a long-haired person who was next to me. The hand towards Mother felt this fantastic cool breeze, whereas the one towards this guy felt tremendous heat. As I was doing that, this man turned around to me — I can’t remember exactly what he said to me — something like that he didn’t like me at all. You know, it was the first time I had felt the difference between the cool and the heat.
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The protection of Her embrace
One day I remember suddenly becoming consumed by a tremendously deep desire to give something to Shri Mataji, as a kind of an unconscious gesture, as to thank Her for all She had done for me and, at the risk of being dramatic, for all that She had saved me from. I searched earnestly for something appropriate of my own that I could give Her because, of course, I had no money then. Finally, I came upon an old and somewhat heavy and ornate bracelet that my grandmother had given me. It was not particularly valuable and was not a style that suited me, but somehow it seemed to be the most valuable and appropriate gift I had.

I went to the weekly public program in Caxton Hall, in the heart of London, which Shri Mataji gave every week, hoping somehow to have the opportunity to give it. When I got there, most people were sitting inside the room as usual, trying to meditate, waiting for Her to come from Her flat nearby in Ashley Gardens. I remember not being sure what to do and then deciding to take the rather bold step of hanging around near the entrance of the room with the designated official welcomers, hoping somehow to waylay Her before She went in. I was trying to wait discreetly and not be too obtrusive, when suddenly She came up the stairs with the two or three yogis who were assisting Her. But, before I had my opportunity, She turned aside and went in, with two yoginis, to the ladies’ cloakroom. Instinctively, I took the very bold step of following in after Her. This was actually very presumptuous and actually rude of me, but somehow I could not stop myself — the desire to give this gift was so overwhelming. I must reiterate that to me it was not the gift that was important, but that I had to give something to express all that was in my heart — this overwhelming deep feeling of gratitude and thankfulness.

I waited in the outer room of the cloakroom in the narrow space, so, as Shri Mataji came out, I was suddenly standing facing Her. She was right in front of me. “Excuse me, Shri Mataji,” I said, “I just wanted to give this gift to You.” At the same time, I felt conscious that this gift was not adequate to express all that was in my heart. She stood there for a moment, looking straight at me and then stepped forward and put Her arms around me completely, swamping and enveloping me in Her warmth and the protection of Her embrace. She stood like this for what seemed like such a long time. It is hard to describe the completely encompassing sense of love and compassion and safety I felt in Her arms in that timeless moment. Then She stepped back and went out to the program. This incident is a supreme example that, for Shri Mataji, it never mattered to Her what the gift was. It was only the feeling behind it that She measured.
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Like a thick transparent shell of silence
I still have this wonderful image of Shri Mataji standing by a sofa and pointing at some hand-drawn diagram of the chakras and explaining it to us and having my first footsoak sitting in front of Shri Mataji. One of the Sahaja Yogis brought a basin of salty water and She was working on me with limes and the amazing thing was that I allowed it all to happen because my background had been twelve years in a Methodist school, plus my engineer’s scepticism. Whatever Mother did during those sessions cleared me out quite a lot because the next time I met Her in Caxton Hall I experienced spiritual ecstasy.
There were relatively few people in the room. At each program, She would sit down and close Her eyes and those who were Sahaja Yogis would also close their eyes. But I would always watch what was going on, still being rather curious.

On this particular day, which was the 8th of April 1978, I was watching Shri Mataji very closely and She opened Her eyes and looked straight at me. And then something very amazing happened. She just gazed at me and I felt as though I was being pulled into Her eyes. The next thing I knew, I was being whirled into this cosmic flux, going back through time and experiencing — yes, experiencing — all those things that I had studied in history whizzing past me. It is truly hard to describe. I distinctly saw/heard/smelt/felt certain objects like a sabre-tooth tiger, the universe, planets, etc., until it came back to the beginning. And then there was nothing, just nothing. In the middle of this nothingness was Shri Mataji.

It just encompassed me, this complete silence which was like a thick transparent sphere of silence. I was feeling complete love and compassion flowing out of me and I was in tune with everything. All of nature, all of life was living and breathing with me. My every gesture made ripples and waves in this completely interlinked creation. All this lasted for three days and nights, where I was in a perpetual state of ecstasy. It is impossible to describe.
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Just to enjoy
I once had the honour to go to Shri Mataji’s house in London and at one point in the afternoon I was standing on the roof garden and gazing at a beautiful magnolia in the neighbour’s garden. I remember wondering how long it had been there and how much money it must have cost. That evening, Shri Mataji addressed a public program in London and, during it, Shri Mataji mentioned how important it was just to enjoy, that it was silly that some people would look at a flower and waste their time thinking how long had it been there and how much did it cost.
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Programs everywhere
Mother held programs everywhere, from Hindu temples, where She spoke to the resident Hindus, encouraging them to accept Christ, to the Quaker meeting houses.
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And that’s what I needed
I got my Realization at a meeting in Hampstead [in north London] in 1980 and Shri Mataji hadn’t attended. This was in the days when She usually came.
She came the following week and all us new folk were sitting in the front row. There were perhaps thirty people there and there were six in the front, new people. I was second from the end. In those days, She would work on everybody individually.

She had given Her talk and started working on all the people, beginning from the other end and I’m sitting there thinking, “This is it. This is my big moment coming up and She is going to focus on me and I’m going to have the undivided attention of this wonderful lady.” At that point, I didn’t really realize who She was.
So She works along the line and when She got to me, She said, “Oh, you’re all right” and moved on to the next one.
What a lesson for my ego and that’s obviously what I needed at that time — but I’m still here, twenty-one years later.
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It is the love and enjoyment that keeps people in
When you do programs, it is the love and enjoyment that keeps people in. That’s what kept me in Sahaja Yoga. When I first went to see Shri Mataji, the hall was full and She saw this girl I was coming with and She said, “Come in, come in. There’s seats at the front.” This girl was the girlfriend of a friend and when she was invited to go on Shri Mataji’s Feet, she didn’t. I understood something about that and it seemed very natural because Mother was just so motherly. The yogis were so normal, like just all my other good friends, except they were really seekers. It was very impressive meeting, because Mother was talking common sense, that’s what struck me. It was very natural and normal and delivered with such love. It wasn’t a question of “Oh, the vibrations” or “Oh, some kind of vision.” It was just beautiful.
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Chicken and rice
There was one miracle which Shri Mataji did at Caxton Hall in London. She has done similar miracles many times. Mother was invited to dinner at 10 Downing Street, with Her husband and the Prime Minister, Maggie Thatcher, among others. It was Monday and Mother came to the program looking beautiful and ready for the dinner. But Mother had insisted on cooking a meal for us.

So that morning, we had gone to the meat market and had bought chicken legs. I knew that we bought eighty portions. Mother made a delicious chicken dish and we took the pots to the program and served it out after Mother had left, on Her instructions. I was serving the chicken and went on, meanwhile, counting the portions. I got to well over a hundred and just kept dishing out the bits. There was just enough for everyone.
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